recoverymonologue.com

What The Promises Promise

Posted 11/22/2009 @ 10:55:01 am by recoverymonologue.com

You know it's been years since I came in to program and I still get a tingle up my spine when fulfillment of the promises come true. "We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness." I get up each day and thank my Higher Power for another day of opportunities. I have no idea where my day will take me. I try not to project any outcomes. This enables me to stay in the present. My sponsor taught me that, "Life is lived in the present. That's why they call recovery a gift."  I've come to value my sponsor's quotes. He keeps saying to me even today, "Are you enjoying those promises.?" I answer back with a smile on my face and say, "Sure am...sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly." The trick I've learned is that the promises always come to those who work the program...As it states in the fisrt line, "If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are half way through." I use to question when was I ever half way through. But I now understand that they are talking about the gift of the steps. As long as I keep doing my part in recovery, my Higher Power will keep giving me gifts of serenity. It may not always be obvious at first...but if I look around and focus on what has not happened to me since I've been in recovery then I can clearly see the caios that still dwells in my life. My sponsor has made it a point to let me know, "The promises come to those who work a rigorous program, not a half measured program." "I want that feeling of uselessness and self-pity to disappear." The Promises promise that, as well as feelings of peace and serenity. I know the more I work a hard program the farther away the promises will appear. If I work the simple program then the promises are but a few days away. I thank my Higher Power for all the love, support and guidance that I receive while I receive the promise of the Promises because they will always materialize if we work for them. Thank you Papa

Tags: ...

Comments (12):

  • Ted N @ 11/22/2009 ( 11:13:51 PM )
    “They will always materialize if we work for them….” The key word in this phrase is work. That is what I need to do – work. Just like the Promises say, sometimes quickly and sometimes slowly. If I do the work, it will be quickly, if I don’t do the work, it will be slowly. If I do half measures it will be slowly, if I do full measures it will be quickly. Right now I am doing half measures. I need to get myself back on track. I know I am not doing everything I could be doing on a daily basis and I can feel the difference. I am not going to blame it on my sleep, but sleep does have a part in it. Also, my lack of routine has a part in it. But the bottom line is I need to make a decision to do what I need to do daily to work my program. I know what it feels like to work a good program and I know what the results are when I do. So I just need to do it. For some reason it is hard right now because my life has gone through a change and I have been struggling to adapt to the change. But I need to preserve and make that change. But this topic is not perseverance, it is the promises. And I know that if I can make these changes and get my program back on track I can get my promises back on track and I will feel good about myself. Writing this post is a start and it helps.
  • Marvin @ 11/23/2009 ( 10:49:52 AM )
    I remember my first meeting and listening intensely when somone read the Promises. I cried. The hope they provided were the impetus for changing my life. I knew the road ahead was going to be difficult and long but the promises spoke to me. I wanted freedom from addiciton and I wanted happiness in my life. Serenity and peace was something foreign in my vocabulary but I was willing to go to any length.
    The Promises are still part of my daily morning reading and they do come true. My whole attitude and outlook upon life has changed and I know this because I no longer fear my addict taking over my thoughts and actions. And because I am painstaking about this and every phase of my development, God is doing for me what I cannot do for myself. It isn't easy but it's worth every painstaking moment and every joyous accomplishment.
  • Anon @ 11/25/2009 ( 2:30:27 PM )
    Promises… I thought trust was one of the promises that we would get. Why then doesn't my wife trust me? I have been sober about 6 weeks (after many relapses in the previous year) and now have that new attitude toward life that we all seek. I haven't lied to her in more than a month yet still doesn’t have the trust I think I deserve. I think she should let the past 10 years of lying, deceit and infidelity be forgotten and start living in the present. I understand that "time takes time" but isn't six weeks enough time?

    Even more beautiful and much quicker to return is the trust I have in my recovery and that is a promise that is hard to beat. The freedom I feel from the absolute compulsion that controlled my day and my life is gone. As I recently heard at a meeting "today I control my sexuality rather than my sexuality control me". This is a long way from thinking my addict doesn't call me every day with promises of that good old time. Today however I realize that good old time wasn't as good as I thought it was. It actually made the rest of my life miserable. That promise my addict gave me was a lie. The promise that sobriety seems to give me is much greater and appears to be the truth.

    "If we are painstaking about...new freedom and happiness". That statement comes after the fifth step not during the first. Maybe by then I will get some of the trust I long for but realize I don't yet deserve. It's been promised to me by this program but it doesn't really promise when. I wait for that day when all the promises are here and will work towards deserving them. They don't come either free or quickly.
  • Ally @ 11/27/2009 ( 11:27:55 AM )
    "A new freedom and happiness" Four years ago this Thanksgiving weekend my husband confronted me about an affair. He was devistated and told me to get help or get out. It actually took me about a year to get help and another year to find the rooms. THEN it took the next two years in the rooms to get 3 months. But TODAY I have three months sober and do see the promises working in my life.

    That daily obession and compulsion has been lifted (for today and my recent past I will pray daily that it doesn't come back). That has been my biggest gift, when I had to live life and fight the compulsions I didn't do very well.

    Today I feel whole, I feel loved and most importantly feel healthy. It is so true, "sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly they will always materialize if we work for them".
  • Ted N @ 11/29/2009 ( 1:41:56 AM )
    The promises say a lot of things and they promise a lot of things, but one thing they say is that we will be amazed before we are half way through. Tonight I was amazed. I was amazed and I was happy. I was amazed because I was in an environment that could have been very triggering for me and it was not. I think it was not because I went with someone which is what I always need to do and I was honest with that person about being in recovery. So it made it easier to be there. And I was happy because I felt completely at ease and free to be myself in this new world that I am starting to explore. Because after the work that I have done some promises are starting to come true for me. It was fun to be walking around and to actually run into people that I knew in this new world. I had a great time and I did not want it to end. I cannot wait for more nights like that. I was so excited and it really gives me hope unlike the other night when I felt like I had no hope. This is exactly what I needed and I am grateful that Mike was there as a volunteer and we just happened to be talking and ended up going to the party together. It was a coincidence – not! I do not believe in them. I think it happened for a reason and I am grateful. It was another step on my journey and it was great!
  • Mike A @ 11/29/2009 ( 8:00:57 AM )
    I love the promises. When I was new in AA i always listen to them at the end of the meeting. It gave me hope. I had faith that if i did what they told me, they would come true. I have the same faith in SAA. All the promises didnt come true in AA because of the sex addiction. I dont think I felt like I deserved them in my core. They say the promises start happening after the 9th step and i never got that far. I defenatley feel like they are starting to come true now that im getting out of the shadows, and into the steps. I do feel and new freedom. I have a long way to go but it feels good to know I am on the right path.
  • nick @ 12/04/2009 ( 6:19:06 PM )
    Promises. For me, the promises aren't only about what the program offers but the promises I've made -- to myself -- to stay focused and work the program. I'm reminded every day of the promise of the programm. Even when trouble comes -- check that: especially when trouble comes.
  • John K. @ 12/14/2009 ( 3:42:46 PM )
    A new freedom and a new happiness. They sound wonderful. I thought that I had them and now realize it was not true. I have learned that with freedom comes responsibility. Happiness comes from within. Both are gifts from God, that I do not want to loose.

    Thanks for reading,

    God love you.
  • Kreg @ 12/17/2009 ( 3:56:02 AM )
    I remember my very first meeting. I didn't know anything but I volunteered to read. It just so happen to be the Promises. I went through the whole meeting but I was unable to share due to my emotional state. During the meeting I read the Promises several times and they made sense to me then but even more so now. When it came time for me to actually read the words I was unable. I broke down. A fellow brother volunteered to read the Promises in my place. That was my first experience with the Promises.

    Today, 53 weeks later with 8 months sobriety, I have some freedom in many areas of my recovery, and life. It has been a wonderful feeling. I am learning things about myself every day. I see and feel the promises. "Sometimes Quickly, Sometimes Slowly".

    But like John K. stated with freedom comes responsibility, How very true… As an addict I must be careful not to take advantage of the freedom or take it for granted or else I could fall terribly far.

    The Promises are wonderful…. I am looking forward to experiencing more of what the Promises have in store for me as I continue through my journey.

    To all be well and be blessed….
  • Anon @ 01/07/2010 ( 5:43:33 AM )
    I wrote previously (11/25/09) on this topic. At that time I actually had about 9 weeks of sobriety (though I believe time is an irrelevant and inaccurate measure of sobriety).

    I've maintained my sobriety since that time and am now beginning to regain that trust that I want so much. I vacilate between the thoughts of "I deserve the trust" and "How can I expect the trust to be given based on past lies".

    I do believe that the promises of sobriety come in bits and pieces. While they are dependent upon our remaining sober, they don't necessarily come at any specific time period or what we may consider "depth" of our sobriety. They come when they are ready, not always when we think we are.

    Relax, enjoy and appreciate the progress we are making to the fulfillment of these promises. Doing that is just another promise.
  • John K. @ 01/23/2010 ( 2:57:20 PM )
    I shared on this above and want to add this. It has been just over 5 weeks since the first recovery that I have had in months. I blessed a friend in the rooms today who was going to the Gentle Path for his own recovery. I pray that his will be a time of reflection and healing for himself and will bring back his insights. My own insights have grown since being away from home and reflecting on how my life was unmanagible and that I was an addict. It is not so bad to admit it, in fact it is healing in its own way. Just for today, I am sober and the promises are what they promise, a new freedom and a new happiness.

    Thanks for reading,

    God love you.
  • Tom @ 02/21/2010 ( 1:16:36 PM )
    The Promises are my favorite reading in the meetings. At my first meeting, overwhelmed by feelings of shame and guilt, lost and out of control, I found hope. I listened, as best I could in my condition, to the readings descibing SAA, sex addiction, the twelve steps, and Answers in the Heart. I listened to learn what I was getting myself into and began to feel OK. Then the Sharing portion of the meeting started and the chairperson said they will do mini first steps for the newcomer. I came out of a focus on my self as I listened to members share their stories and their feelings. I was amazed that a room full of men could be so open and honest with each other. I heard my story and began to feel a sense of belonging. I did not share except to thank everyone for making me feel welcome and comfortable, and I thanked everyone for sharing their stories. I told them I was ready to do what ever it takes. Then someone read the Promises. What a way to end a life changing event for me. I received the gift of Hope and knew I was in the right place. I have been in Recovery and abstinent for seventeen months and I still look forward to hearing the Promises. The shame and guilt have been lifted, I am coming to know peace and serenity, and whenever I begin to be tempted or forget that my Higher Power is with me, the Promises of the program interject themselves into my life and I am grateful.
Post a New Comment
Your Name:
Your Email:
Comment: